It has been many months since I have posted on The Beautiful Women Project site. I would like to thank the many faithful followers that continue to be interested in the our work, despite not posting on the site in recent months. I have decided to pick up where I left off, sharing thoughts and insights, commenting on popular culture, and chiming in on what makes women beautiful.
The truth as to the reason why I stopped writing is quite simple, I lost track of myself in the whirlwind of that which we all call life: work, the responsibilities of being a wife and mother, making sure there was food in the refrigerator, clothes were cleaned, soccer games were watched, homework was done, telephone calls were returned, bills were paid, and the list went on and on and on. I kept up the pace until it all took its toll on me and I simply...broke.
I have taken the past months to practice what I have been preaching - reflecting on who I am as a person, discovering and rediscovering what I really like about myself, opening up the luggage that I have been carrying around and taking out what no longer works for me in order to move forward. In order to have the future that I want I needed to look at what was not working in my life...and let go. Letting go has been the hardest part of the process. Letting go of old thought patterns and relationships has been the most challenging, but necessary in order to embrace the future.
As this blog evolves, my hope is that there will be more sharing of life experiences. It is through sharing that we know that we are not alone in our life's journey. It is my hope that we will have more commenting, and guest bloggers. If you are interested in sharing and idea or writing a weekly pieces, please do not hesitate to contact me through the site.
Showing posts with label transformation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label transformation. Show all posts
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Friday, May 8, 2009
We are Stronger Than We Give Ourselves Credit For
We all have things that keep us from moving forward with our lives, and it takes strength and courage to move through these experiences. The challenges come in different forms, and arrive in our lives at different stages of our personal development.
"How do I find my place?" "How do I develop a support system of friends that accept and support me for who I am today?" "How do I balance work and family?" "How do I find time for myself?" "Am I strong enough to run 2 miles?" "Am I strong enough to face what is ahead of me?"
Avoiding our challenges is easy, keeping our heads down and continuing on our current paths. Yet, when we do, we keep from moving forward with our lives. We miss out on all of the wonderful things that happen to us on our journey toward our goals. It is often the experiences along the way are often more valuable than our intended endpoint.
"How do I find my place?" "How do I develop a support system of friends that accept and support me for who I am today?" "How do I balance work and family?" "How do I find time for myself?" "Am I strong enough to run 2 miles?" "Am I strong enough to face what is ahead of me?"
Avoiding our challenges is easy, keeping our heads down and continuing on our current paths. Yet, when we do, we keep from moving forward with our lives. We miss out on all of the wonderful things that happen to us on our journey toward our goals. It is often the experiences along the way are often more valuable than our intended endpoint.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Springing Into Ourselves
After a few weeks of needed respite, The Beautiful Women Project is back on-line.
Spring has arrived and it is one of the most wonderful times of the year. Like the flowers and trees, many of us are finding our energy again, growing and changing after a long winter's rest. Once again, it is time to open up our personal "suitcases" and peer inside. Sorting through our "stuff" is a wonderful exercise in self reflection and growth. Ask yourself, what are the things in my life that I want to continue to carry? These are elements of your being that support you, feel good to you, allow you to continue to grow and change. Then look at the things in your suitcase that are holding you down, don't make you feel good about yourself and your life, keep you from growing into the person you want to be in your lifetime. These things include thought patterns, habits, friends, jobs, and sometimes it may mean family members. It is hard to "unplug" from the comfortable, but what is comfortable may not be what is best for you as you create your life's picture. And that picture is a BEAUTIFUL image of yourSELF.
Enjoy the spring, it is a time of life and reflection on the past moving toward renewal for the future.
Spring has arrived and it is one of the most wonderful times of the year. Like the flowers and trees, many of us are finding our energy again, growing and changing after a long winter's rest. Once again, it is time to open up our personal "suitcases" and peer inside. Sorting through our "stuff" is a wonderful exercise in self reflection and growth. Ask yourself, what are the things in my life that I want to continue to carry? These are elements of your being that support you, feel good to you, allow you to continue to grow and change. Then look at the things in your suitcase that are holding you down, don't make you feel good about yourself and your life, keep you from growing into the person you want to be in your lifetime. These things include thought patterns, habits, friends, jobs, and sometimes it may mean family members. It is hard to "unplug" from the comfortable, but what is comfortable may not be what is best for you as you create your life's picture. And that picture is a BEAUTIFUL image of yourSELF.
Enjoy the spring, it is a time of life and reflection on the past moving toward renewal for the future.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
A New Year, A Love Renewed
The New Year. A celebratory time when all that has passed has passed and there is so much hope and goodness on the horizon. A time for new beginnings, new ways of thinking about ourselves, and reconnecting with our inner selves. The Beautiful Women Project would like to share with all of you this poem by Derek Walcott entitled, "Love After Love".
The time will come
When, with elation,
You will greet yourself arriving
At your own door, in your own mirror,
And each will smile at the other's welcome,
And say, sit here, Eat,
You will love again the stranger who was yourself.
Give wine, Give bread. Give back your heart
To itself, to the stranger who has loved you
All your life, whom you ignored
For another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,
The photographs, the desperate notes,
Peel your image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.
Welcome to a New Year, A Love Renewed
The time will come
When, with elation,
You will greet yourself arriving
At your own door, in your own mirror,
And each will smile at the other's welcome,
And say, sit here, Eat,
You will love again the stranger who was yourself.
Give wine, Give bread. Give back your heart
To itself, to the stranger who has loved you
All your life, whom you ignored
For another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,
The photographs, the desperate notes,
Peel your image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.
Welcome to a New Year, A Love Renewed
Sunday, November 23, 2008
So Much to be Thankful For
Even in the most challenging times, we all have so much to be thankful for in our lives. Thanksgiving is an opportunity to take a moment and give thanks for all that we do have in our lives instead of focusing on those things that are currently missing or seem out of our reach. Thanksgiving is also a time to look at the opportunities that lie before us, and remember that opportunities come in some of the most surprising shapes and forms.
Here is one minute exercise to do on your own - or even try it with your friends and family over the holiday.
(1) In thirty seconds list the things that you are thankful for in this moment of your life.
(2) In thirty seconds list the things in your life that you would like to change or that are proving to be extremely challenging for you in this moment of your life.
Take some time to reflect on both of your lists and give thanks for everything on both lists.
It is easy to be thankful for all of the things we want and have in our life. It is difficult to give thanks for your challenges and unwelcome situations, but you have the power within yourself to turn things around. By giving thanks for the things that you don't necessarily like or want, you are immediately changing the power that it has over your life. Simply finding the positive in something that seems overwhelmingly negative changes your life's dynamic.
Most importantly, remember that it is all a part of your life's journey and that....
Here is one minute exercise to do on your own - or even try it with your friends and family over the holiday.
(1) In thirty seconds list the things that you are thankful for in this moment of your life.
(2) In thirty seconds list the things in your life that you would like to change or that are proving to be extremely challenging for you in this moment of your life.
Take some time to reflect on both of your lists and give thanks for everything on both lists.
It is easy to be thankful for all of the things we want and have in our life. It is difficult to give thanks for your challenges and unwelcome situations, but you have the power within yourself to turn things around. By giving thanks for the things that you don't necessarily like or want, you are immediately changing the power that it has over your life. Simply finding the positive in something that seems overwhelmingly negative changes your life's dynamic.
Most importantly, remember that it is all a part of your life's journey and that....
LIFE + EXPERIENCE = BEAUTY
HAPPY THANKSGIVING FROM THE BEAUTIFUL WOMEN PROJECT
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Finding Inspiration
The Beautiful Women Project believes that our greatest life challenges should also be viewed as our greatest opportunities. Challenging times are a wonderful opportunity to ask ourselves, "What inspires me?" "Who inspires me?" "How can I inspire others?"
It is through inspiration that our greatest acts of love and kindness emerge from us. Inspiration turns acts of hatred into acts of kindness and compassion. Inspiration transforms a doodle on a scrap piece of paper into an image that transcends form and figure. Inspiration provides a pathway away from self hatred to a life filled with self love.
Inspirations is a wonderful gift that you can give to yourself and share with others around you. Your inspiration may just be how you get through the challenging opportunities that lie before you today.
It is through inspiration that our greatest acts of love and kindness emerge from us. Inspiration turns acts of hatred into acts of kindness and compassion. Inspiration transforms a doodle on a scrap piece of paper into an image that transcends form and figure. Inspiration provides a pathway away from self hatred to a life filled with self love.
Inspirations is a wonderful gift that you can give to yourself and share with others around you. Your inspiration may just be how you get through the challenging opportunities that lie before you today.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Forget the Shoulds, Just Be.
In our minds we all have ideas about how we should look, how we should dress, how we should act, and even who we should strive to emulate. That is a whole lot of shoulds. What is wrong with just being who we are? The simple fact is, we are so focused on the shoulds, we have lost sight of the being we are all.
It is very important to reacquaint yourself with the person that you are today. What makes you feel beautiful? I have been asked, what do you mean? For me, I feel most beautiful when I am sitting alone in my bathroom waxing my legs. Yes, you really just read that sentence. It's quiet and intimate. I also feel amazing when I am behind the my camera...I am my true self. Some women feel beautiful when they are out in a restaurant having their hand held by the man they love, some feel beautiful reading under an elm tree in the summer, some feel beautiful singing along with their car radio. You may not be sure what that “thing” is off the top of your head, but through self-examination, you will find it.
Below you will find a series of random questions. Provide the answers that come immediately to your mind. I usually find your instinct serves you best. You are not being judged or graded, you don't even have to share your answers with your closest friend. Just enjoy the experience of your beauty. Enjoy being who you are in this moment of your life.
It is very important to reacquaint yourself with the person that you are today. What makes you feel beautiful? I have been asked, what do you mean? For me, I feel most beautiful when I am sitting alone in my bathroom waxing my legs. Yes, you really just read that sentence. It's quiet and intimate. I also feel amazing when I am behind the my camera...I am my true self. Some women feel beautiful when they are out in a restaurant having their hand held by the man they love, some feel beautiful reading under an elm tree in the summer, some feel beautiful singing along with their car radio. You may not be sure what that “thing” is off the top of your head, but through self-examination, you will find it.
Below you will find a series of random questions. Provide the answers that come immediately to your mind. I usually find your instinct serves you best. You are not being judged or graded, you don't even have to share your answers with your closest friend. Just enjoy the experience of your beauty. Enjoy being who you are in this moment of your life.
Favorite Soundtrack/Song:
Favorite Movie
Favorite Television Show
Favorite Time of Day
Favorite Season of the Year
Favorite Form of Exercise
Favorite Food
Favorite thing to Shop for
Childhood Ambition
First Job
Perfect Day
Indulgence
Biggest Challenge
Inspiration
Proudest Moment
Wildest Dream
Fondest Memory
Complete the following sentences:
I begin each day…
I end each day…
I am most comfortable…
I am most uncomfortable…
A person that sees me walking down the street would never believe/guess…
When I look in the mirror I see…
Monday, September 15, 2008
Threads of Beauty
For the past two summers I have been fortunate to have The Beautiful Women Project spend the summers at Wiawaka Holiday Retreat House for Women. It is a beautiful place in Lake George, NY and it is exactly what its name claims to be...a holiday retreat for women.
This year I led two workshops one entitled The Dynamics and Importance of Female Friendships and another on The Threads of Beauty. I created this workshop discussion specifically for a group of women who came to Wiawaka to spend their time together quilting. Not a quilter myself, I spent a great deal of time researching and learning about the art of quilting. Simply stated by the Columbia Encyclopedia, "Quilting is a form of needlework, almost always created by women, most of them anonymous, in which two layers of fabric on either side of in interlining are sewn together, usually with a pattern of back running (quilting) stitches that hold the layers together."
Quilting, a form of storytelling, is a six step process...Six steps that parallel the stories of the telling of an individual's life story.
1. Selecting a Pattern, fabrics, and batting...Who do I want to be? What is my story?
2. Measuring and cutting fabrics the correct size to make blocks from the patterns...An individual's life experiences are the building blocks of their life. We each have our own size and know what is best fit for our life.
3. Piecing blocks together to make a finished "top"...Meeting life's experiences and seeing opportunity in the good as well as the challenges.
4. Layering the quilt top with batting and bcking to make a "quilt sandwich"
5. Quilting by hand or machine through all of the layers of the quilt sandwich...Carrying your experiences so they shine through you for those around you to encounter and bask in your light.
6. Squaring up and trimming excess batting from the edges, sewing and stitching the binding to the quilt backing...Packing and repacking your luggage along your journey. What may have been important or worked in your life in the past may no longer serve you in your present moment.
What are the layers that hold your life together?
This year I led two workshops one entitled The Dynamics and Importance of Female Friendships and another on The Threads of Beauty. I created this workshop discussion specifically for a group of women who came to Wiawaka to spend their time together quilting. Not a quilter myself, I spent a great deal of time researching and learning about the art of quilting. Simply stated by the Columbia Encyclopedia, "Quilting is a form of needlework, almost always created by women, most of them anonymous, in which two layers of fabric on either side of in interlining are sewn together, usually with a pattern of back running (quilting) stitches that hold the layers together."
Quilting, a form of storytelling, is a six step process...Six steps that parallel the stories of the telling of an individual's life story.
1. Selecting a Pattern, fabrics, and batting...Who do I want to be? What is my story?
2. Measuring and cutting fabrics the correct size to make blocks from the patterns...An individual's life experiences are the building blocks of their life. We each have our own size and know what is best fit for our life.
3. Piecing blocks together to make a finished "top"...Meeting life's experiences and seeing opportunity in the good as well as the challenges.
4. Layering the quilt top with batting and bcking to make a "quilt sandwich"
5. Quilting by hand or machine through all of the layers of the quilt sandwich...Carrying your experiences so they shine through you for those around you to encounter and bask in your light.
6. Squaring up and trimming excess batting from the edges, sewing and stitching the binding to the quilt backing...Packing and repacking your luggage along your journey. What may have been important or worked in your life in the past may no longer serve you in your present moment.
What are the layers that hold your life together?
Sunday, September 7, 2008
What We Have to Show for Our Lives
My cousin called me today in distress. Always a strong and independent woman, she is a mother of three young children, a successful business woman, and a wife of fourteen years. Her marriage is in dire straits, and it is her belief that she will soon be a forty five year old single mother. A child of divorce herself, this is not what she wanted for her life or the lives of her children. Quietly she asked, "For all that I have invested in my life and marriage, what do I have to show for my life ?" Knowing my cousin's nature, she wasn't looking for sympathy, but brutal honesty.
My cousin grew up in a tiny little town on top of a mountain. A tomboy, she found her life's passion in downhill skiing and was chosen to attend a private high school that would take her off her mountain and into a strange and exciting world. A college awarded her a full skiing scholarship and with further development she qualified as an alternate on the US Olympic Ski Team. At any point in her lifetime she could have returned home to work in her family's established business, a business that would have provided her with a very comfortable life. Instead, she chose to strike out on her own. With time, she established not one, not two, but three successful businesses. She always recognized the responsibility she had for the lives of her employees and their families, and when times were tough she would take on additional jobs as a waitress, ski instructor and coach, or respiratory therapist in a local hospital, in order to keep things afloat. Always a mother to her children and wife to her husband, it was her that made sure that they bills were paid, the laundry was completed and the groceries were in the refrigerator and cupboards. The importance of love, family, and friendship - lessons learned on top of her chilhood mountain home, are now passed onto her children. When her father was terminally ill, she was his primary care giver, with him until he took his final breath. Over the years she has created a network of friends that are there for her in times of celebration and support her in her darkest hours, often when family was too far away. There are children that she instructed on the ski slopes that are on race teams across the country or just enjoying the winters with their families year in and year out because of her instruction. There are little babies that have grown into thriving teenagers because she was there for them in the neo-natal unit helping them breath when their little lungs needed assistance. There are three amazing children thriving in the world because of their mother. I believe that she found it hard to believe that she thought for even a moment that she had nothing to show for her life.
Often when posed with the question, "What do I have to show for my life?" we are looking for material, tangible pieces of evidence. The truth be told, the measure of a life isn't how much money has accumulated in a bank account, the number or kind of cars in a garage, the waist or dress size you have hanging in the closet - or the size of your closet for that matter. The answers to the question are quiet similar to the definition of beauty: It is the sum of your life experiences. The answer lies in your life's journey.
We all have things in our lives demonstrate our life's value. Even during the most challenging times, there are amazing things. Find a moment in the next week to recognize all of the wonderful things that you have to show for your lifetime.
My cousin grew up in a tiny little town on top of a mountain. A tomboy, she found her life's passion in downhill skiing and was chosen to attend a private high school that would take her off her mountain and into a strange and exciting world. A college awarded her a full skiing scholarship and with further development she qualified as an alternate on the US Olympic Ski Team. At any point in her lifetime she could have returned home to work in her family's established business, a business that would have provided her with a very comfortable life. Instead, she chose to strike out on her own. With time, she established not one, not two, but three successful businesses. She always recognized the responsibility she had for the lives of her employees and their families, and when times were tough she would take on additional jobs as a waitress, ski instructor and coach, or respiratory therapist in a local hospital, in order to keep things afloat. Always a mother to her children and wife to her husband, it was her that made sure that they bills were paid, the laundry was completed and the groceries were in the refrigerator and cupboards. The importance of love, family, and friendship - lessons learned on top of her chilhood mountain home, are now passed onto her children. When her father was terminally ill, she was his primary care giver, with him until he took his final breath. Over the years she has created a network of friends that are there for her in times of celebration and support her in her darkest hours, often when family was too far away. There are children that she instructed on the ski slopes that are on race teams across the country or just enjoying the winters with their families year in and year out because of her instruction. There are little babies that have grown into thriving teenagers because she was there for them in the neo-natal unit helping them breath when their little lungs needed assistance. There are three amazing children thriving in the world because of their mother. I believe that she found it hard to believe that she thought for even a moment that she had nothing to show for her life.
Often when posed with the question, "What do I have to show for my life?" we are looking for material, tangible pieces of evidence. The truth be told, the measure of a life isn't how much money has accumulated in a bank account, the number or kind of cars in a garage, the waist or dress size you have hanging in the closet - or the size of your closet for that matter. The answers to the question are quiet similar to the definition of beauty: It is the sum of your life experiences. The answer lies in your life's journey.
We all have things in our lives demonstrate our life's value. Even during the most challenging times, there are amazing things. Find a moment in the next week to recognize all of the wonderful things that you have to show for your lifetime.
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Beauty All Around Me
I have returned to the place The Beautiful Women Project began and I am happy to report that there is so much beauty around me.
In the past week, I have observed women of all ages, shapes, sizes, and cultures embracing their lives. Because they are so unencumbered by their physical bodies there is a great deal of laughter, playing, conversation, sharing, exploring, learning, and celebrating.
Women are eating delicious and nourishing foods. Women are swimming in the sea and in the pools with their families. Women are dancing to the music playing in the parks into the night. Women are reading and sharing ideas on the world and life. All of this is going on amongst women who are family, friends, strangers meeting for the first time, and across generations. It is a very supportive environment.
There is a lot to be learned from the lives of these women. My greatest wish is that I could bottle all of this up and bring this home to America. I can't do this, but I can continue to dedicate myself and The Beautiful Women Project to shaping a healthier frame of mind for and about beautiful women.
In the past week, I have observed women of all ages, shapes, sizes, and cultures embracing their lives. Because they are so unencumbered by their physical bodies there is a great deal of laughter, playing, conversation, sharing, exploring, learning, and celebrating.
Women are eating delicious and nourishing foods. Women are swimming in the sea and in the pools with their families. Women are dancing to the music playing in the parks into the night. Women are reading and sharing ideas on the world and life. All of this is going on amongst women who are family, friends, strangers meeting for the first time, and across generations. It is a very supportive environment.
There is a lot to be learned from the lives of these women. My greatest wish is that I could bottle all of this up and bring this home to America. I can't do this, but I can continue to dedicate myself and The Beautiful Women Project to shaping a healthier frame of mind for and about beautiful women.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Going Back to the Beginning
The message of the Beautiful Women Project is simple, yet so poweful: It is the sum of a woman's life experiences that make her beautiful. For those who have heard me speak either at an exhibition, during an interview, attended a workshop, or have been reading The Beautiful Women Project's blogy, you know that I often write about the need to experience your own beauty. Our experiences are what define who we are as an individual, as a woman. The Beautiful Women Project is one of the greatest experiences of my life.
The Beautiful Women Project began as I sat on the beach in Italy in 2003. My husband is Italian, and we go home every summer to visit our family. This particular summer I was acutely aware that, despite my accomplishments I was not proud of who I was because I was not proud of my body. As I sat under my umbrella, hiding from the world, I began observing all of the women around me on the beach. They were, unlike me, embracing their lives. Swimming, playing, talking with one another, laughing with their families: completely uninhibited by their bodies. They were so beautiful. Their beauty was shining through them, to be shared with all of us around them, for the world to see. I wanted to gain what they had that I did not yet possess. I wanted to know what they knew about true beauty, so that I too could begin embracing life.
When I returned home, I continued to observe and write about beauty; how I wanted to discover, uncover, and share beautiful women that were beautiful because of how they met their challenges and carried their experiences. I set out on a mission of a lifetime. The Beautiful Women Project has become, not only a documentary photography exhibition, but opportunities for women and men to come together to discuss beauty and make real changes in their lives.
Five years later, I am returning to Italy. In previous posts I have written about writing down your life experiences and in moments of self doubt, darkness, and strength going back and reading through your entries to see how far you have come. Reading your life's journey in order to EXPERIENCE your own beauty. So, to mark this five year milestone, with strength and beauty shining through me, I am going back to the beach in Massa to experience my beauty. I know how far I have come in five years. With pen, paper, cameras, and hopefully a good internet connection, I am going to share my observations on beauty from the place it all began.
Going back to the beginning can be as simple as remembering a time in your life when you were truly happy and proud of yourself as a woman. Going back to the beginning can be a quiet moment of reflection and recognition of the woman that you have grown to become today. Going back to the beginning may help you realize that it is time to pack and repack your life luggage - things that you needed to carry with you, even just a few months ago, no longer work for your life today. Going back may mean beginning today to move forward.
Arrivederci!
The Beautiful Women Project began as I sat on the beach in Italy in 2003. My husband is Italian, and we go home every summer to visit our family. This particular summer I was acutely aware that, despite my accomplishments I was not proud of who I was because I was not proud of my body. As I sat under my umbrella, hiding from the world, I began observing all of the women around me on the beach. They were, unlike me, embracing their lives. Swimming, playing, talking with one another, laughing with their families: completely uninhibited by their bodies. They were so beautiful. Their beauty was shining through them, to be shared with all of us around them, for the world to see. I wanted to gain what they had that I did not yet possess. I wanted to know what they knew about true beauty, so that I too could begin embracing life.
When I returned home, I continued to observe and write about beauty; how I wanted to discover, uncover, and share beautiful women that were beautiful because of how they met their challenges and carried their experiences. I set out on a mission of a lifetime. The Beautiful Women Project has become, not only a documentary photography exhibition, but opportunities for women and men to come together to discuss beauty and make real changes in their lives.
Five years later, I am returning to Italy. In previous posts I have written about writing down your life experiences and in moments of self doubt, darkness, and strength going back and reading through your entries to see how far you have come. Reading your life's journey in order to EXPERIENCE your own beauty. So, to mark this five year milestone, with strength and beauty shining through me, I am going back to the beach in Massa to experience my beauty. I know how far I have come in five years. With pen, paper, cameras, and hopefully a good internet connection, I am going to share my observations on beauty from the place it all began.
Going back to the beginning can be as simple as remembering a time in your life when you were truly happy and proud of yourself as a woman. Going back to the beginning can be a quiet moment of reflection and recognition of the woman that you have grown to become today. Going back to the beginning may help you realize that it is time to pack and repack your life luggage - things that you needed to carry with you, even just a few months ago, no longer work for your life today. Going back may mean beginning today to move forward.
Arrivederci!
Sunday, July 13, 2008
A New Formula for Beauty: Life+Experience=Beauty
Advertising is tricky business. The goal of advertising is to make consumers feel like they are getting something special - something that only a select few can achieve. The irony of it all is that, like body perfection, advertising is in itself an illusion. Advertisers want consumers to feel like they are attaining something special whether it be beauty, body perfection, both and more - when all along they are mass marketing products to you and millions of other consumers promising everyone the same thing.
It is easy to fall prey to advertising's enticements, in today's fast paced world who doesn't want to get from point A to point B in ten seconds or less? But how likely is it that true beauty is so simple that it can be found in a bottle of expensive moisturizer, or within a tube of whitening toothpaste, or in a syringe at your dermatologist's office? These products claim to have special formulas that have been clinically proven to make you beautiful. Funny how all of them require you to pay to find something that you already possess.
Beauty is something that we we are born with, and it stays with us throughout our lives. Beauty doesn't care about our age, our weight, our social or economic status, and especially not the brand of moisturizer we choose from the shelves. Unfortunately, somewhere along our journey many of us lose sight of our own beauty and advertisers are just sitting and waiting to present us with their formulas for their definition of beauty, their illusion of what it means to be beautiful. There is only one formula that will lead you, or help you to return to your own beauty, and it won't cost you a penny to get there: Life + Experience=Beauty.
Life - it is what we all do from the moment we open our eyes to the moment we fall asleep. Embracing what comes before us, the people that cross our paths, the opportunities that we are presented (positive and negative) each and every moment of each and everyday.
Experience - often the defining moments of our lives. These moments do not have to be earth shattering in nature, but ulitmately lead us toward being the type of women that we are proud to present to the world.
Beauty - the sum of your life experiences. There is no amount of money that can buy you this.
It is easy to fall prey to advertising's enticements, in today's fast paced world who doesn't want to get from point A to point B in ten seconds or less? But how likely is it that true beauty is so simple that it can be found in a bottle of expensive moisturizer, or within a tube of whitening toothpaste, or in a syringe at your dermatologist's office? These products claim to have special formulas that have been clinically proven to make you beautiful. Funny how all of them require you to pay to find something that you already possess.
Beauty is something that we we are born with, and it stays with us throughout our lives. Beauty doesn't care about our age, our weight, our social or economic status, and especially not the brand of moisturizer we choose from the shelves. Unfortunately, somewhere along our journey many of us lose sight of our own beauty and advertisers are just sitting and waiting to present us with their formulas for their definition of beauty, their illusion of what it means to be beautiful. There is only one formula that will lead you, or help you to return to your own beauty, and it won't cost you a penny to get there: Life + Experience=Beauty.
Life - it is what we all do from the moment we open our eyes to the moment we fall asleep. Embracing what comes before us, the people that cross our paths, the opportunities that we are presented (positive and negative) each and every moment of each and everyday.
Experience - often the defining moments of our lives. These moments do not have to be earth shattering in nature, but ulitmately lead us toward being the type of women that we are proud to present to the world.
Beauty - the sum of your life experiences. There is no amount of money that can buy you this.
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Being a Good Friend to Yourself
When it comes to friends, I don't have many, but I have the best. They accept me exactly as I am - a bit scattered at times, usually five minutes late, uncomfortable in large crowds, and often disappearing for weeks at a time with no notice. My friends like me for who I am, flaws and all. They didn't choose to be my friend because of what I look like, the clothes I wear, or the number on my scale.
Friends love us for who we are - not what we look like. It is time we begin to look at the relationship that we have with ourselves in the same way. Why is it so hard to love and accept ourselves for the women that we are today and are striving to be tomorrow? What will it take for women to be good friends to themselves?
With our days jam packed it is easy to overlook the most important person in our lives: ourselves. Like all of our relationships, this one needs work as well, but it is the easiest to overlook. Try to take some time out everyday - or at least twice a week - to nurture the relationship with yourself. It can be as simple as talking to yourself - verbalize your thoughts, fears, and questions in a soft whisper or a full voice in your bedroom, shower, car, or office. Hearing your thoughts out loud often makes them more "real" and not just thoughts and notions in your head. Journal writing is another wonderful way to get in touch, and stay in touch with yourself. When your thoughts, ideas, notions, dreams, and fears are "out there" you have made the choice to make them a priority, perhaps getting over that scary first admission and putting you on the road to dealing with issues and coming up with a solutions. Putting your thoughts and fears out there may also make it easier to talk about your situation with your family, friends, doctor, boss, co-worker - whomever you may need to turn to for support or resolution.
Another way to get to know yourself better is to ask questions. You may be surprised how little you know about the woman that you are in this particular stage of your life. What may seem like a simple question may stumble you: What is your favorite food? What is your biggest challenge? Proudest moment? Wildest dream? For a rainy day, try deeper reflection where you need to answer with more than a single word or sentence: I am most comfortable/uncomfortable...., A person walking down the street would never guess or believe..., When I look in the mirror I see.... Your answers may lead you to make changes, re-set your compass, or make you aware of the goodness and beauty that resides within you.
Taking the time to reflect on who you are will lead to down a wonderful path of self discovery. You will see what others already know about you - why they chose you to be their friend. The greatest way to be a good friend to others is to begin by being a good friend to yourself.
Friends love us for who we are - not what we look like. It is time we begin to look at the relationship that we have with ourselves in the same way. Why is it so hard to love and accept ourselves for the women that we are today and are striving to be tomorrow? What will it take for women to be good friends to themselves?
With our days jam packed it is easy to overlook the most important person in our lives: ourselves. Like all of our relationships, this one needs work as well, but it is the easiest to overlook. Try to take some time out everyday - or at least twice a week - to nurture the relationship with yourself. It can be as simple as talking to yourself - verbalize your thoughts, fears, and questions in a soft whisper or a full voice in your bedroom, shower, car, or office. Hearing your thoughts out loud often makes them more "real" and not just thoughts and notions in your head. Journal writing is another wonderful way to get in touch, and stay in touch with yourself. When your thoughts, ideas, notions, dreams, and fears are "out there" you have made the choice to make them a priority, perhaps getting over that scary first admission and putting you on the road to dealing with issues and coming up with a solutions. Putting your thoughts and fears out there may also make it easier to talk about your situation with your family, friends, doctor, boss, co-worker - whomever you may need to turn to for support or resolution.
Another way to get to know yourself better is to ask questions. You may be surprised how little you know about the woman that you are in this particular stage of your life. What may seem like a simple question may stumble you: What is your favorite food? What is your biggest challenge? Proudest moment? Wildest dream? For a rainy day, try deeper reflection where you need to answer with more than a single word or sentence: I am most comfortable/uncomfortable...., A person walking down the street would never guess or believe..., When I look in the mirror I see.... Your answers may lead you to make changes, re-set your compass, or make you aware of the goodness and beauty that resides within you.
Taking the time to reflect on who you are will lead to down a wonderful path of self discovery. You will see what others already know about you - why they chose you to be their friend. The greatest way to be a good friend to others is to begin by being a good friend to yourself.
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Beautiful Women...Meet The Genuine Men
This weekend The Beautiful Women Project launched its "brother" project, The Genuine Men Project (www.thegenuinemen.com). These travelling exhibitions have identical messages: we need to begin defining individuals by the sum of their life experiences.
The Genuine Men Project focuses on the life experiences of thirty five men - ordinary fathers, sons, brothers, husbands, and neighbors that we encounter everyday. As the women of Beautiful Women... Celebrating Beauty in Stories and Stills attempts to redefine society's view of women and beauty, the men portrayed in Genuine Men...Journeys in Stories and Stills redefine what it is to be a role model by showing that what makes us strong is the way we approach, deal with, and then carry our challenges and life experiences. Their stories represent the type of men that others will want to emulate in their own life long journeys.
I began this project at the urging of my oldest son. As I completed The Beautiful Women Project, he marched in my office and declared, "You know mom, it isn't fair that you do girls and you don't do boys." He was absolutely correct. There is a great deal that we can all learn from the stories of men. I encourage you to take a moment to visit The Genuine Men Project web site and take another step and read the stories of these amazing men in the project's companion book, Genuine Men...Journeys in Stories and Stills (Bridgeway Books, 2008).
The Genuine Men Project focuses on the life experiences of thirty five men - ordinary fathers, sons, brothers, husbands, and neighbors that we encounter everyday. As the women of Beautiful Women... Celebrating Beauty in Stories and Stills attempts to redefine society's view of women and beauty, the men portrayed in Genuine Men...Journeys in Stories and Stills redefine what it is to be a role model by showing that what makes us strong is the way we approach, deal with, and then carry our challenges and life experiences. Their stories represent the type of men that others will want to emulate in their own life long journeys.
I began this project at the urging of my oldest son. As I completed The Beautiful Women Project, he marched in my office and declared, "You know mom, it isn't fair that you do girls and you don't do boys." He was absolutely correct. There is a great deal that we can all learn from the stories of men. I encourage you to take a moment to visit The Genuine Men Project web site and take another step and read the stories of these amazing men in the project's companion book, Genuine Men...Journeys in Stories and Stills (Bridgeway Books, 2008).
Sunday, May 4, 2008
How Do I Find the Beauty Within Myself?
I was shopping for shoes yesterday, when I woman commented to me, "I always wanted to be able to wear high heels. I am already six feet and they just didn't work for me." My immediate reply was, "I always wanted to be tall like you, that is why I am buying shoes with such high heels!" It just goes to show that it is hard to accept our own beauty and to look at our unique qualities as just that, qualities. Beauty is not something that we have to chase after, it is already of part of who we are as individuals. So how do we find, accept, and share with the world the beauty that lies within all of us?
The first step is to just look in the mirror and smile back at the reflection staring back at us. Self acceptance is the first, and sometimes hardest part of finding our own beauty. It is something that I work on everyday. Yes, we have our good days and not so good days: great hair, but puffy eyes; great skin, but our rear ends don't look so good in those pants. The combinations of good/bad are endless, and the odds of good/good/good occurring in our own eyes is very small. By changing the way that you view yourself will help you change the way that you think of yourself. Make it simple: when you look in the mirror, instead of putting yourself physical self under a magnification lamp, ask yourself these kind of close-up questions: Do I like the individual looking back from the mirror? Do I respect the woman in front of me? Can I be proud of the way this person conducts their life? If you answer yes to any of your own questions, you are looking at a beautiful woman.
If you are unable to answer any of those questions in a positive manner, take a moment and reflect on what you can do in your own life so you will like, respect, and be proud of yourself. Empower yourself, be an agent for positive change in your life.
Accepting our beauty is as simple as recognizing that physical beauty is only a part of who you are as a beautiful woman, it is not all of who you are as a beautiful woman. I am not six foot tall, but that doesn't mean that I am not beautiful at five foot tall. Another way of accepting our own beauty is to say thank you to compliments that you receive, whether it is about your appearance or an accomplishment. Feeling good about ourselves, accepting our selves, at any given moment of any given day, is an imporant key to accepting the beauty that lies within.
And sharing, how do we share the beauty that lies within? Allowing our experiences to shine through us for the world to experience. Smile. Laugh. Cry. Tell a colleague that they look nice. Tell a friend that you were touched by them. Hug someone. Do not hide from the world, share yourself with all of those around you.
Uncovering, accepting, and sharing your light, love, passion...yourself is the most wonderful experience. When it happens, you will ulimately uncover, discover, and recover the beauty that has always been a part of you.
The first step is to just look in the mirror and smile back at the reflection staring back at us. Self acceptance is the first, and sometimes hardest part of finding our own beauty. It is something that I work on everyday. Yes, we have our good days and not so good days: great hair, but puffy eyes; great skin, but our rear ends don't look so good in those pants. The combinations of good/bad are endless, and the odds of good/good/good occurring in our own eyes is very small. By changing the way that you view yourself will help you change the way that you think of yourself. Make it simple: when you look in the mirror, instead of putting yourself physical self under a magnification lamp, ask yourself these kind of close-up questions: Do I like the individual looking back from the mirror? Do I respect the woman in front of me? Can I be proud of the way this person conducts their life? If you answer yes to any of your own questions, you are looking at a beautiful woman.
If you are unable to answer any of those questions in a positive manner, take a moment and reflect on what you can do in your own life so you will like, respect, and be proud of yourself. Empower yourself, be an agent for positive change in your life.
Accepting our beauty is as simple as recognizing that physical beauty is only a part of who you are as a beautiful woman, it is not all of who you are as a beautiful woman. I am not six foot tall, but that doesn't mean that I am not beautiful at five foot tall. Another way of accepting our own beauty is to say thank you to compliments that you receive, whether it is about your appearance or an accomplishment. Feeling good about ourselves, accepting our selves, at any given moment of any given day, is an imporant key to accepting the beauty that lies within.
And sharing, how do we share the beauty that lies within? Allowing our experiences to shine through us for the world to experience. Smile. Laugh. Cry. Tell a colleague that they look nice. Tell a friend that you were touched by them. Hug someone. Do not hide from the world, share yourself with all of those around you.
Uncovering, accepting, and sharing your light, love, passion...yourself is the most wonderful experience. When it happens, you will ulimately uncover, discover, and recover the beauty that has always been a part of you.
Monday, April 28, 2008
Redefining Beauty
My goal in creating The Beautiful Women Project was to foster a very public discussion of the definition of beauty. It has been stated time and time again in this blog, The Beautiful Women Project definition of beauty is simple, yet powerful: it is the sum of a woman's life experiences that make her beautiful.
Everyday I read articles in print and online about body image, clothing, workplace issues, gender in government, young women and eating disorders, mother's trying to help their daughters, women trying to find their place in the world...each subject touches upon the same issue: no one is buying into society's current definition and vision of beauty. So if we are not buying into it, what are we doing about changing it?
For our part, The Beautiful Women Project continues to travel to communities throughout the country raising awareness that beauty comes in many different shapes and forms. These women are role models for us all reminding us that beauty surrounds us every single day. From the very beginning I believed that through the images and stories in Beautiful Women if just one person could view an image and/or read at least one story and no longer feel alone, weird, or isolated in their own life experiences...if I just touched someone in a way that they giggled, shed a tear of joy or sadness...thought of a sister, mother, aunt, or friend...if someone just looked at another a little differently after experiencing Beautiful Women...I had had done something about changing society's definition of beauty. I am so proud to say that I know that has happend at our exhibitions. This is why we work so hard to bring the exhibition to communities. This is why we published Beautiful Women...Celebrating Beauty in Stories and Stills so we can touch those that cannot view the exhibtion in person. That is why we began this blog, to foster discussion amongst like minded people, and those that come from a different perspective in order to initiate a new kind of communication. That is how change takes place - opening up and sharing thoughts and perspectives in a respectful space.
Please help us continue our mission by contacting The Beautiful Women Project so we can bring the exhibition to your community. Speak up on the blog - share your thoughts with us and others about redefining beauty. It takes just one spark to light a fire - your thought, idea, or vision just may be the one that spreads like wildfire. Share It.
Everyday I read articles in print and online about body image, clothing, workplace issues, gender in government, young women and eating disorders, mother's trying to help their daughters, women trying to find their place in the world...each subject touches upon the same issue: no one is buying into society's current definition and vision of beauty. So if we are not buying into it, what are we doing about changing it?
For our part, The Beautiful Women Project continues to travel to communities throughout the country raising awareness that beauty comes in many different shapes and forms. These women are role models for us all reminding us that beauty surrounds us every single day. From the very beginning I believed that through the images and stories in Beautiful Women if just one person could view an image and/or read at least one story and no longer feel alone, weird, or isolated in their own life experiences...if I just touched someone in a way that they giggled, shed a tear of joy or sadness...thought of a sister, mother, aunt, or friend...if someone just looked at another a little differently after experiencing Beautiful Women...I had had done something about changing society's definition of beauty. I am so proud to say that I know that has happend at our exhibitions. This is why we work so hard to bring the exhibition to communities. This is why we published Beautiful Women...Celebrating Beauty in Stories and Stills so we can touch those that cannot view the exhibtion in person. That is why we began this blog, to foster discussion amongst like minded people, and those that come from a different perspective in order to initiate a new kind of communication. That is how change takes place - opening up and sharing thoughts and perspectives in a respectful space.
Please help us continue our mission by contacting The Beautiful Women Project so we can bring the exhibition to your community. Speak up on the blog - share your thoughts with us and others about redefining beauty. It takes just one spark to light a fire - your thought, idea, or vision just may be the one that spreads like wildfire. Share It.
Sunday, April 13, 2008
Spring Into Your Beauty
Spring has arrived, and it is a great time of year for defining - and redefining - who we are as women. The Beautiful Women Project is dedicated to challenging the traditional definition of beauty and asking everyone to take a moment and ask themselves, "what is my personal definition of beauty?" Our definition is simple, yet powerful: Beauty is the sum of a woman's life experiences.
The freckles on the cheeks that appear in the summer are reflections of days spent outside having lunch with friends, walking your dog, playing with your children. The lines around your mouth are from laughing at bad jokes, smiling for countless pictures, a constant movement you do with your mouth when you are nervous. The curves that you own, that may have not been there when you were a young girl, are testament to your development and metamorphosis as a woman. And the glow that comes forth from you when you enter a room...that is your true beauty, those are your experiences shining through you for the world to see.
So with spring upon us, take a moment and define - or redefine - your beauty. Think about who you are and what makes you most proud of the woman that you are today. Ask yourself what do I want to do next with my life? Where do I want to be next week, next month, next spring? The experiences that you have along the way to accomplishing the goals that you set for yourself, these are your beauty defining moments. Some will be wonderful, some will be difficult and trying. Just remember that these experiences are your true beauty.
The freckles on the cheeks that appear in the summer are reflections of days spent outside having lunch with friends, walking your dog, playing with your children. The lines around your mouth are from laughing at bad jokes, smiling for countless pictures, a constant movement you do with your mouth when you are nervous. The curves that you own, that may have not been there when you were a young girl, are testament to your development and metamorphosis as a woman. And the glow that comes forth from you when you enter a room...that is your true beauty, those are your experiences shining through you for the world to see.
So with spring upon us, take a moment and define - or redefine - your beauty. Think about who you are and what makes you most proud of the woman that you are today. Ask yourself what do I want to do next with my life? Where do I want to be next week, next month, next spring? The experiences that you have along the way to accomplishing the goals that you set for yourself, these are your beauty defining moments. Some will be wonderful, some will be difficult and trying. Just remember that these experiences are your true beauty.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Back from A Beauty Break
The Beautiful Women Project has not had a new posting for two weeks, to be honest every once in a while I think that we can all use a "beauty break". Everyday I read speak to people about beauty and body image issues, read hundreds of articles in newspapers in magazines from around the world, scan internet blogs and listen to radio programs all having something to do with beauty, body image and women's issues. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do, but there comes a point where we all need to take a step back and give ourselves space and time. With so much sharing going on, it is important to take time to process what we take in - and decide what is right for each of us as individuals. The most wonderful thing about beauty is that it is unique, personal, the sum of our life experiences - and what is right for one is not right for everyone.
Beauty is exhausting. Finding ourselves is a process. Transformation takes patience. At The Beautiful Women Project we are really talking about transforming how as individuals define our own beauty not only ourselves, but also how society defines beauty. The folktale about the tortoise and the hare is tried and true - slow and steady wins the race. There is no quick fix for finding our inner beauty or for redefining how we see ourselves and others. Yet, with time and an open mind it is our belief that it will happen in the most wonderful and positive of ways.
Beauty is exhausting. Finding ourselves is a process. Transformation takes patience. At The Beautiful Women Project we are really talking about transforming how as individuals define our own beauty not only ourselves, but also how society defines beauty. The folktale about the tortoise and the hare is tried and true - slow and steady wins the race. There is no quick fix for finding our inner beauty or for redefining how we see ourselves and others. Yet, with time and an open mind it is our belief that it will happen in the most wonderful and positive of ways.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
